Why Women Are Better Than Men...
What a pile of pants day we had pool wise in Plymouth for the men... but the ladies... the ladies triumphed magnificently over Oxford.
Anyway, what have we learned... well the first learning point of the day is dont ever listen to me. In the last news item I said we were all together. We weren't and the ladies were separate. If you want to know who you're playing ask your captain, or look at the fixture lists... for your viewing pleasure the following links should give you all the info you need. Just dont listen to me. Ever:
Again, a point prior to the main events:
Some major respect has to go to Big Bentley... not for his pool, that's still crap... but for his massive achievement in the latest of his awesome events. He has filled his North Somerset Tour and as a result some further funds will be reaching the county coffers. This is great news and is a real testament to his ability to organise a quality set of events. First one is Saturday June 20th, if you're not in it there will still be some quality players on show, would be worth popping down to the Railway for an hour in the afternoon and seeing a bit!
Now, on to the Pool. As the best display of the day, I will hand over to Captain Gallichan to electrify you with her own brand of sporting commentary entertainment, take it away big girl...
Ladies - Oxford 11 North Somerset 17 Started the first leg in a bit of a rush we lose that leg 4-3 second leg was a bit better we won that leg 4-3 the third leg was absolutely awesome with a 6-1 win and the last leg we won the first two game to win us the match then we sort of chilled out a bit and won the last let 4-3 all in all was a good day! Well done to all my ladies today! Would also like to say welcome to our new player Hayley who played awesome on the day with an amazing 3/4 well done hun, hope to see you at every other game too! Lady of the match Well that was a difficult one, most of us got two's but for me it had to be Sarah, as she did win the only game she played and it also happened to win us the match, well done hun! Nat was also awesome with a 3-4 win which to be fair she was showing off again, well done babe! X Goosebumps... well done ladies, may I extend a welcome to the lovely Hayley from the rest of this motely crew and thank you Madame G, now on to the rest of you bunch of losers...
Mens A - Lost 20-16 to Plymouth
Well, what can you say. You're all a bunch of muppets. Absolute waste of my key tapping. I have a bad hand and all I can think of is why am I even writing this. What a complete bunch of numpties...
Now I've got that out of my system, our second learning point of the day; every so often dont let Dave pick the team... it all went wrong from there. losing the first two sets 6-3 we had to intervene... so, whilst he was busily potting balls we chose our own side and managed to win the last 2 5-4.
Nevertheless, despite Dave's flawed existence, we are in exactly the same position we've always been in. Away to Plymouth never matters - their tables are crap and we never win there.. it's all about Wiltshire and getting the old fifty shades whip out for them... give it to the Wilts boys and we're exactly where we want to be...
We did have a couple of stand out performances - Dave sorted himself out with 4 from 4... screw the team eh Dave? Dont worry about getting the selection right... as long as you're ok... Another person's 4 from 4 was flawlessly executed, but I dont like to blow my own trumpet... nearly slipped a disc last time I tried it...
Stand out performance of the day for the As has to go to 'Macho Man' Piggy on the coach on the way back... havent seen hip movement like that since Shakin' Stevens...
Mens B - Lost 20-16 to Plymouth
If there's any Solace Dave can take from the day, it's that Craig's just as crap. With perfect tables for the Bs, who like to smack it about 20 cushions before going in the hole, it was an unfortunate day for the big boys.
Several of the team shooting blanks, it's a life risk with a squad our age, it was a long old trip for not much in return... nevertheless it's how you finish not how you start... plenty of time left to stick it up the rest... Craig's got big shoulders, a sparkle in his eye and a spring his step... he'll sort you lot out.
A couple of stand out performances - Malcolm and John both getting 3 from 4... and of course Chewy's uncannily natural Village People cabaret...
Mens C - Lost 29-7 to Plymouth
Robbed, just robbed.
At least Mitch won £100 on the fruit machine. That has to be the stand out performance. It's not until you take it you can safely say you prefer to give...
Seniors 15 vs Plymouth Seniors A 10
Seniors 11 vs Plymouth Seniors B 14
Against the Plymouth SA we were taking on the team that beat both Bristol A and B seniors, we got off to an even start, taking the first leg 3-2, then losing the second 2-3. Then came the crunch as we all stepped up a gear to smash the third set 5-0. The last two legs were a repeat of the first two with 3-2 and 2-3 score lines, meaning a quality win of 15-10. Both myself and Dave Cryer taking 4 from 5 frames but quality performances all round with the 8ball clearances on show. A well oiled performance in more than one sense.
As the Plymouth teams play in separate venues, half of the squad stayed at Cues to play the Plymouth SB team. Unfortunately the score was chased down but could not be in our favour.
Not the easiest of tables to play on, as the Men's matches also reflect.
Full credit to Nigel Thatcher in hitting 4 from 5.
Mens Seniors vs Plymouth B Lost 14-11
Even the intense pressure of urine filled sacks can't save us all the time, and this proved to be the case for the second of our seniors sides... splitting the seniors in half was always a risk and it proved to be... first three each went 4-1, with us taking the second, last two also shared, both 3-2.
Nigel's 4 from 5 seems to be the pick of the bunch... it seems to help being pretty much the same drunk as he is sober when it comes to this hour.
And the highlight of the day had to be the coach back... made you proud to be yokel... the coach driver exposing Olly's erectile disfunction to the whole of the A38 and, as we descended into party classics, we left our cares back in Plymouth to focus on the glories ahead of this great team for the rest of the season.
